*I’ve rebelled for the last 52 Weeks post and instead of choosing 1 photo I’ve chosen 6.
“And I’d unmask each one ’til they exile me”
– Limplifter ‘Hostess’
I am finding it hard to write this last 52 Week of Self-Portrait post, and not just because right after taking these the corner of this lovely and very heavy mirror fell onto my very large forehead and gave me a concussion. But please do excuse me if I’m a little off my game writing this – I’ve spent the last two days lying in bed not being able to stand upright and function and am just getting back into having my full brain capacity back (is it really ever truly back?). So this week’s photos are supposed to be some meta type style post where I show you the Doppelgängers of photography. That weird notion that what I’m showing you on a weekly basis is such a narrow view of what’s actually happening. How I can change the perception of myself and my appearance at will to create another version of myself. In most of these I’m directly showing you the camera and using the mirror to show that other side and even how different the same person can look at just the slight difference of angle. It’s really the absurdity of self-portraits. When I see self-portraits done by professional photographers all I think about is their setup, their crew, the behind the scenes, what that looks like. How much thought they had to instil into that one image to create the perfection that can truly be expressed with self-portraiture. As you can tell by my series over the last year I don’t often use tripods and in fact when I do I look 100% more awkward and out of place with what to do with my body and my face. I always feel like the camera is an extension of my arm and when it’s not there I am at a loss…which I guess in theory makes me probably not a suitable photographer for self-portraiture. I’m unsure. I often realize I do self-portraits because I have an idea, something I want to create but do not have a model to test it on, which is a weakness I have to work on and this project has enforced that. I’ll be discuss more about my final thoughts about this project next Thursday so I won’t go more into that but basically thought for the last photo I wanted to share what it actually feels like if you were to be my neighbor and were looking out your window on occasion and seeing me in all manner of outfits taking photos of myself. How I can create my own Doppelgängers and transform myself. I’m not 100% happy with the final photos, I will be directly about that and they weren’t the original idea but fuck sometimes you just end up with the shots you end up with. Sometimes you end a project by giving yourself a concussion with the prop you are using – life happens. It’s the end. 52 Weeks came and went on Sunday.
50/52: 90s Child
52 Weeks of Self-Portrait is almost finished and I can’t believe I only have 2 more to do before completing an entire year of weekly self-portraits. The name for this week’s, 90s Child came about because of the amazing fake fur jacket I found at H&M yesterday. It’s an incredible find (only $30 on sale from $90) and I just had to pick it up because in the late 90s I always wanted this raver style jacket. It also has a bit of that Spice Girl’s vibe to it, so very 90s to me for some reason. Plus it has bear ears, so I think it’s supposed to be polar bear coat? Regardless it is now my favourite coat that I own, the only disappointment is I won’t be able to wear it very much this year as Winter is starting to disappear (there is a lot of hope in that statement since after week of beautiful weather it just snowed all weekend). The outfit is also very Batman. I don’t even know why I own a Batman pin and pants of the same logo but I do now and I love it. I picked up the pin in Toronto last month and for some reason a week ago when I saw these pants I decided they had to be mine even though I am only a fan of the original Batman series. I love the outfit and I never do OOTD’s – in fact I didn’t even know what that stood for until a week ago so I thought what the hey and did one before the project was through. The shirt is also H&M if you care and the two pigtails are going to be my new thing this spring so you might see me rocking them a lot. I haven’t figured out exactly how I want to style them so these are just quickly pulled together but I can’t wait to learn how to do more complex variations. Hope you are enjoying the end of your weekend and just a quick note that I will be taking the next week off because I need to do some work on both of my websites plus a few projects that I’ve been neglecting so I will see you next week on Sunday for the next 52 Weeks post!
More detailed shots of the outfit and hair!
47/52 The Snow Yak
I can’t believe there are only 10 more self-portraits left before I finish my 52 Week project. This week’s came to me in the middle of the night when I realized that soon the snow might be gone and thought, hey that Mark Ryden mask I have of The Snow Yak should make an appearance this winter. If you want a weather report of Montreal, it’s been snowing all week and -30 except for today so I’m crazy for thinking the snow will go away any time soon. I’ve been all over the place this week so it’s not hard to imagine my braid would leap there. My friend Zara is moving out of Montreal back to the West Coast and I think it’s really made me feel like I need to change up my life some way too so I’ve been obsession this week about organizing my house. Last night I finally hit my breaking point and I started moving furniture around at 3am (sorry downstairs neighbours) and completely changed how my living room/office looks. I had been thinking of turning our entrance room into a library of sorts and making the living room to be more functional as an office so I just started doing it. Right now everything around me is a mess but I feel like the next week I can organize and make positive changes and maybe that’ll clear my head a bit. This week inspirational song goes with the theme by the way, a British indie band by the name of…
“So I took a trip inside my mind
And it opened up these eyes which had been blind
I saw wonders I can’t define
Then I lost control and I fell
From this earthly heaven into hell
how long i stayed there, I couldn’t tell”
– Yeti “Never Lose Your Sense of Wonder”
I love the expression the mask has direct on, it’s so joyful.
Am I nerd because I enjoy this photo simply because it has a Plague Doctor mask in it? Well it’s not %100 that mask but it does have the correct beak for it. It’s actually some cheap theater mask from Dollarama that I bought a few years ago in the hopes of transforming it one Halloween. Me and best friend Ana in our early 20’s always had a desire to dress up as Plague Doctors together but never did. I found it last night in my kitchen cupboard while organizing and wanted to wear today. I do love the silhouette of me and the mask as it’s hard to tell this is a self-portrait. Double exposures are great for that. If you wanted to see me wearing the mask, here is a silly shot of me on my balcony:
Haha. I have a few more double exposures of me wearing this mask that I might just share at some point and time. I have a real trouble with this 52 Weeks of Self-Portrait project simply being satisfied with one photo. There is more black and white photography coming up this week, enjoy!
At the Drive-in “Take Up Thy Stethoscope and Walk”
A silly photos this week for my 52 Weeks project because I wanted to share how rainbow my newest hair color looks. For those of you out there with dyed hair, do you ever do this? I always love taking photos of my hair flipped upside down when I have a lot of colors in. It’s bit harder to do now that my hair is so long. I’ve actually been getting recently a lot of comments about how long it is. It definitely not that fun having it long in this heat but for summer the bright colors go well with all my summer dresses. I just wish my neon green actually liked to stay green and not yellow. If you want to know what colors I used its Special Effects Cupcake Pink, Special Effects Atomic Pink, Manic Panic Atomic Turquoise, and Manic Panic Electric Lizard. Oh and you can see one of my tattoos in the photo – just barely.
June is at an end, and it was really quiet a up and down month for me. I am happy to say I’ve tried out 3 of my cameras the Metro-Flex, Disderi Robot Lens and Kodak Brownie 620 (the photos from the last two will be out this week) and I’ve developed 4 rolls of film at home. I’ve also acquired a old school popsicle mold and have been making homemade recipes for the last 2 weeks, and they have all turned out wonderfully much to my delight and Victor’s. I am happy to announce as well that I will be doing Recipe posts for popsicles with lots of pictures on my blog starting in July and ongoing to August and perhaps even September. I also manged to go for a long walk every week with Victor and have been keeping up with my daily photos for my 365 Challenge (still haven’t missed a day or resorted to taking shots with my phone). The weather though has been getting in my way a lot with it’s own up and down cycle…mostly choosing to be rotten on my days off. I have been working on decorating the new house as well but am quiet disappointed I haven’t manged to paint it all yet. However it has been a great month, and I am very excited for July. I will be turning 28 in a few days and visiting Vancouver for a week at the end of July. As well I will be attending and being a bridesmaid at my dear friend Nicole’s wedding when I am there. Vancouver is where most of my friends live, so it’s very exciting to go back and see everyone. I have arranged a few photo shoots as well and will have lots of photography to share with you guys. I am even trying more of my vintage cameras this month and hope to pick a new toy one for my birthday. Hope you had a delightful June.
a few of my favourite posts from June:
Feel like I’m caught inside that little space underneath your heart and your concrete…
Vintage Tuesday: Metro-Flex
Lomography Wednesday: Holga Macro Lens
Pick of the Week: Karolin Felix
Monthly DIY: Hanging Memories
Monthly Review: Diana F+ Lens Adaptor
What I Wore: Purple Haze
I was just thinking today about what was happening in my life in April last year. For one it was sunny, and I had just gotten my facial piercings put in (I cant believe I’ve had these guys for a whole year – I still love them so much), and I had apple colored hair and bangs! So much has changed but still I feel like the same person. I’m actually dying my hair this color again next week, I miss the green. I decided to add a silly one of me trying to do a double exposure. The shots all turned out blurry but I still like this one, I look so serious though!
Maybe I can do a year ago post in April every year, that’d be fun.
Well March has been a great month for me, a lot of new changes in my life have come about and they are all very exciting. I am more then ready to take Citizen Erased Photography in the coming of Spring (it’s still feels like winter here in Montreal)
a few of my favourite posts from March:
Pick of the Week: Le Mort Pop Club by We Are Wolves
Lomography Wednesday: Holgaroid a Review
Adventure in Pysanky Eggs
If you’d be my King, I’d be your Queen
Picture of the Week
Saturday Review: Man Ray
Things that happened in March:
- I started a 365 Challenge on Tumblr
- I moved from the Plateau to the Village part of Montreal into a wonderful apartment, it feels almost like a new life
- I started developing my own film (so far I’ve been so busy with moving that I only got the chance to do 1 roll, you can check out the results here, and here!)
- I changed my hair to be half purple and half blue, which is a brand new design for me.
- My friends from Toronto came to visit me over St Patrick’s Day weekend, and it was a lot of fun.
- My favourite band put out a new album, I actually did a review for it, and have been listening to it non-stop.
- and last but not least, I got a new vintage camera, check her out!
I am so excited to finish unpacking boxes so I can start developing more film and showing off my new apartment and office!